[Question] How Fast Should You Move With a Man?
An Email Series for Decoding Men’s Strange Behavior in Dating and Relationships
Hello,
This is Orlando from this website. This blog post comes from one of the emails from my series in my newsletter for dating and relationship tips for midlife women who desire to understand how our male minds work.
I’ve received many emails over the years asking me to decode their man’s mind in order to help them understand what action to take. In this series, we will cover the Qs and As.
And let’s be clear. I’m only referring to men who WANT relationships. Not the others who only want a fling or some fun and then run.
Let’s get to it.
This blog post from my email series pertains to the QUESTION of How Fast You Should Move with a Man.
At the bottom, you can click the link to the ANSWER.
First, let’s set up the situation. Can you relate?
So, you met this guy and you like him.
A lot.
But he frustrates the hell out of you.
This scares you because it feels like he’s toying with your feelings. You don’t want to get too emotionally involved because you fear he may one day just disappear.
For example, one day he texts all day.
The next day once.
Then nothing.
Then none again.
You video chat and he gushes all over you. You might even go out and laugh, smile, make out, and have a real good time.
Then for two weeks, he’s too busy again.
Next, he says that he can’t wait to see you and the cycle begins again.
One day you wake up to a cute good morning text about how he’s ecstatic to spend the night with you to watch movies and make out.
The following week???
… the infamous, soul-crushing phrase, “I’m not ready for a serious relationship.”
(You SCREAM in frustration- inside, of course, because you fear scaring him away).
Pop Quiz!
Who is doing the CHASING here?
You are.
So, if you asked me in this situation how fast should you go?
I’d say you’ve already gone too fast.
What does your man mean by, “I don’t want a serious relationship,”?
It means…
Well, do you really want to know the truth or do you want me to candy-coat it?
It means he has one foot in this “quasi-relationship” and one foot out.
“Why” you ask?
It could be for a number of reasons.
But the bottom line is all that matters.
Whatever his reason is, he is holding out for something else.
So, he’ll just enjoy the ride in the meantime.
ALL of us guys have done this.
Including me.
Don’t hate me.
I am here to tell you that YOU are the one doing the chasing.
If you only knew how much POWER females possessed over us men you wouldn’t even be here reading this email, you’d probably be reading one of his texts while he gushes over you.
(We’ll look at some of the Female SUPERPOWERS later in this email series).
What should you do differently?
Your goal should be to get your man to chase.
EVERY time.
Yes, it may take some adjustments on your part physically, to your hair or wardrobe, BUT MORE THAN ANYTHING you need to change your perspectives- BOTH about YOURSELF and what you THINK MEN WANT.
But mostly about YOURSELF.
Did you know that even the hottest women SCARE MEN OFF?
In fact, a lot do.
Why?
Because they don’t see their own strengths.
They should be their biggest fan, rooting themselves to find a happy joyful relationship.
But in this situation, just look up at the scoreboard…
Score: Him 1, You 0
I want to change that.
Later in this email series, I will share what men want to see in the women that will make them chase.
These are the women that men will desire to have long-term relationships with. And it has nothing to do with just good looks. Good looks only draw attention but they do not fulfill a man’s long-term needs.
We will discuss the HIGH-VALUE women traits AND actions that attract us men and compare them to LOW-self-value traits that SCARE THE S*** out of us.
(Sorry, I don’t like to curse much).
Ready for more?
Want to learn …
1) When you are going too fast
2) How to slow down
3) Some mindsets and strategies to help TURN it AROUND to make him chase.
[CLICK HERE] for the answer of how to know how fast to move with men in dating and relationships.
